How are your New Year resolutions if you had ones? I bet you are not that strongly committed to them anymore or you even stopped doing what you promised yourself to do already long time ago. Assuming that is the case, it’s a question of how concrete, manageable and measurable your goal was/is.  

Human nature is tricky. We aspire most wonderful great things for us and others and so we seem to be prepared to conquer every obstacle that hinders reaching our wonderful goals. Or maybe it is just my age which helps to realize that big and small goals cannot be reached without small steps in our days. I sometimes make an agreement with my clients that they will do a small thing, a small step during the week hoping for improving their well-being. So often this step disappears unnoticed. Or I sometimes catch myself thinking that this is too small, I will better concentrate on a bigger goal. As if this small step is not that important, as if it is not worthy our attention, as if it is not the foundation for our big goals.

Now when I want to change something in my lifestyle, I know I will most likely to succeed if I implement something small. It is difficult to change habits. It is easier if they are concrete and measurable. Instead of striving to eat healthily from tomorrow, I will promise myself not to eat deserts for a certain number of days. Knowing that I dread doing sport just for doing sport, I would not live long as a sporty person. Instead I promise myself to do 10 – minutes exercises every morning. Because all those well-meaning strivings, such us to help the humanity, be a better person, or live a healthier life has to be reduced to a practical, concrete and measurable detail to make a difference in our lives.

If you are participating in a conference or reading a book packed with many nice and great things promising tools, you are better off choosing one tip that you are going to implement rather than just talking about all of them. One step at a time.

I am a little bit bored of reading about improving one’s condition. Whether it is a child on a spectrum, a child with anxiety disorder, an employee suffering from too much stress or depression, the baseline every time is this simple: make small and constant changes to your lifestyle. Go for a walk regularly, do not eat sweats, spend time in nature, meditate (for 10 min – will you be able to find 10 min?). Certainly, other things are also needed but nothing will last without your lifestyle changes. You need help not to find out what needs to be done, but rather you need support to carry the changes you most likely know will contribute to your well-being.

What happened to us as a species that somehow we have to relearn the skills of …just living. Human nature is tricky.